Flying past

Chris will be six months in 14 days.... I spend at least 22 hours with him, every single day, yet I cannot believe so much time has passed. Times when I need to carry him for the entire length of his nap, I wish time would speed up, but most days, I find that it's already late afternoon or evening and we're headed for the next day too soon.

I suspect babies cast love spells over their mothers, so we carry on in a giddy haze, all smiley and loving while trying to meet their every whim and fancy. We, or at least I, forget the month we're in, the date, the day of the week, sometimes even the year we're in. I no longer watch the clock when nursing him. Doesn't sound logical, because I do time his feeds and naps, but I don't let the time bother me. I have learnt to watch his cues instead. When in doubt, feed again, or feed more often.

A close friend is already feeling nostalgic about pregnancy and childbirth. Her son is only 11 days older than Chris. I share the nostalgia too, but at this moment, my time is up for childbearing. Not because of health reasons, but because our finances are somewhat tight and because we want to enjoy our children and not have to worry about another one. Plus, with two boys, I do feel like we are complete.  I never say never, but for now at least, no more. Still, I do induldge my sentimentality by watching videos of homebirths and vlogs of YT mommies who have three kids and more. Then I turn to look at Chris and images of his birth flash in my mind. I wish I had been more sentimental about the boys' births and taken more pictures or even a video. But I'm not about to have another child for the sake of satisfying my desire to make more memories.

To Vader and I, the boys sure are growing up fast and growing up handsome :), as to whether they're growing up elephants, that's too soon to tell. I will leave it to Vader to define "elephants"....

Tata!